FREE TV

I have issues. I'm a bit of a pre-Hoarder. Like, if I didn't stay vigilant, I would wind up a full on can't-walk-through-the-house type. Luckily, I am aware and get rid of stuff when necessary. I have been cleaning my house in preparation of my cousin relocating to Dallas and staying with me. While cleaning and fixing up the place, I went ahead and worked on my room. I have this huge open loft shelf thing in my room that would be good for tvs, etc. I have had 2 tvs up there for the last few years (I already told you I have issues). Have I actually turned either tv on? Hahaha no. Maybe a coupla times in the past 4 yrs that they have been up there. Both were old tube (heavy!) tvs, one was a bit smaller and a combo with a dvd player attached.

I was holding on to these for random reasons. "Maybe someone I know will need an old heavy tv that I don't need?" Uhh no, first of all I am the poorest person in my group of friends. Second, you can go buy a flat screen tv the same size for $50. "Maybe I can sell it and get a little cash?" No. See above. By the time I list them on Craigslist and haggle with someone for $25 and have to schedule a time for pickup AND be there to meet this person and not get killed... I mean it happens right? What if some new-fangled CraigsList killer is targeting guys selling economy tvs??!!! What if the killer has some weird anti-glass-tube thing goin on? Even if I don't die, I am definitely losing money. Ugh. 

These are the types of internal discussions that make me a hoarder. Well, "pre-hoarder". Since I live in the city, basically anything of any value to anyone can be set out near the street and before you can get back inside your own house, it will be taken by someone. Good, bad or ugly, it is true. So I decide that these tvs deserve a good home and that someone will be able to use them. Maybe I will brighten the life of a child who wants to watch bootleg Disney dvds, maybe some hombre wants to watch Spanish westerns, maybe a family wants to watch "Home Alone" again and again together. Well now they can do that!! On the tvs I graciously put outside for free. A free tv. That's a pretty good deal right? The act of giving often does more for the giver emotionally than it does for the receiver. True story. 

I get all of the stuff together, remotes, tv/dvd combo, old dvd player, the bigger regular tv and decide that I will put them out in two stages. So I put the dvd combo tv out by the street and get in my car and drive to the gym. I'm having all of these good thoughts and feeling great. Not only did I clear up a very dismal space that I hated seeing every morning, I also improved the life of some stranger around me. GREATNESS!!!

Then it hits me. As I am driving though downtown and almost to the gym. There is probably a gay porn dvd in that tv. Oh shit. I completely forgot to check and see if anything was inside but as I was mentally reflecting on the tvs, I was thinking back to the last time I actually used that little one. Yep, porn. I'm not some crazy porn freak, I swear. But I am mid-30s and we didn't always have the internet. Porn was a valuable commodity and I acquired a couple dvds along the way. Obviously I don't use them often and their very existence slipped my mind. 

FML. I swing around and burn rubber and go back to the house and as I turn the corner, sure enough it is gone. Gone!! Less than ten minutes. SERIOUSLY!? What is wrong with me?? I cannot believe I just spread gay porn out into the world. 

So, the person who got that free tv, SORRY!!! But hey, at least you can watch Home Alone!!